Blondie

I have a cd by Blondie and I call a couple of the songs my convertible songs. This morning when I was going back home from our morning walk, “Heart of Glass” by Blondie came on the radio. It made me think about a date I had. Yes, I have dates that I never talk about and I’m skeptical to even mention this one at all, but here goes. He is the youngest person I have gone out with, but I just had to take him up on it since he was only 48. I told him that I was old enough to be his mother, but he liked me. So, of course we out a few times. I took him for a ride in my convertible one night and when he got in, I looked at him and said, “I guess you know you’re taking your life into your own hands getting in the car with me.” He looked at me and said, “But you promised you wouldn’t put me out anywhere.” We both laughed and I told him I drive fast and I play my music loud. He said that was fine, so we took off. After a while I told him that I guessed that my music was pretty different from the music he plays on the radio. He was a dj on one of the stations. He replied that he was surprised that I like Blondie. I asked why and he replied that most people down here like country music. So, every time I listen to Blondie I think of him. Yes, he was too young for me but we had fun. He moved back to Kentucky to help his parents. DR 6/26/13

My Old Boss

Today I left my office to go get me something to eat and I passed the house where my favorite boss used to live. He died two months before my husband died. I knew his wife and thought why not stop in and say hello. I went up to the door and she was sitting there. She came to the door and just said, Diane! I went in and she hugged me. She said it was so good to see me. Her son Randy was also there. I told Randy I had heard so much about him and that was the first time I had ever met him. It was wonderful to sit and talk about Joe. He was the best boss I ever had. My fondest memory is when he created a job for me. Well, let me back up. He was over Safety and was moved to be over Administrative Services. He told me who my new boss would be and I said oh I really like him. Joe said you will not like him. Well, after two weeks I went to Joe and told him my new boss was the worst boss I ever had. Joe just said I told you. Joe had a secretary who eventually retired and they downgraded that position. Joe refused to hire anyone at that grade level. Guess it was an ego thing. Well, the director of our division came to Joe and told him that he was going to have to do something about the girls who filled in the director’s office. He said they didn’t dress appropriately, chewed gum, and just didn’t fit the picture of what the director’s office should be. Joe called me down to his office the next morning and he said I have fixed your problem and my problem. He said he sat straight up in bed the night before and said my problem and Diane’s problem is solved. He said Joyce said what in the world are you talking about. Anyway, he wrote a job description just for me. I would only be working for him and when someone in the director’s office or the Office of Power would be out, I would fill in. I was already part of the director’s office and knew how everything worked. I told him I would have to think about it. Well, he said a few little words I can’t mention here but he said I created this job for you and you’re taking it. I went back to my office and my boss came out and told me that Personnel had called and was offering me a job to work for Joe. My boss said he had not seen that job advertised and I told him it wasn’t. It was created for me. My boss said well, you are not going to take it and walked down the hall. He made my decision for me. I called Personnel and accepted it. I went from being overworked to really a wonderful position. Joe was the best boss I ever had and it was so much fun talking about him to Joyce and Randy. I think they enjoyed it too. When I left I thought of how many blessings we must miss by just not stopping to see someone. It really made my day. DR 6/25/13

Every Song Has a Story

I always say that my life is like a song. Last night I was with my friend Jeanie at Steak and Shake. I love Steak and Shake mainly because of the music. Well, I do like their milkshakes. I treated myself to one last night and I felt like the biggest sinner on the face of the earth. I realized that with the songs that were being played, some memories were coming back. Some are good and some are not so good. I relate so much of my life to the music. I lost contact with some music during the 70’s. I won’t go into that here as to the why, but part of my life went a little crazy during those years. I heard one song last night and told Jeanie the story behind that one and it depressed me. I told Jeanie that I don’t regret the choices I have made because those choices have brought me to the person I am today. We can all go back and say what if I had done that different, what if I had married someone else. Well for me, I wouldn’t have Christi and my grandsons whom I love more than anything. Also, I probably wouldn’t have ended up with Charles who was the best thing that ever happened to me. We were the most unlikely couple and when we got married, all the men we worked with came to our wedding. They all had me convinced that Charles would chicken out. They were all surprised because Charles was so happy that day and couldn’t wait to become my husband. Until the day he died he always said we were still on our honeymoon. Like most marriages we had our ups and downs but we worked through all the challenges we faced, and I can tell you there were many. At one time we lived in three states at one time. My marriage to Charles was far from being dull and boring. I miss him and his weird outlook on things. The thing I miss most is that he was the only person who knew everything about me and I mean everything, and never judged or criticized me. He loved me for just me. He asked me before we ever dated and I was married to someone else, if I had ever been madly in love. I asked him had he and he said no. He said he wanted to fall madly and passionately in love some day. He always told me everything because he thought it was safe to. So he was the one I asked to take me to singles places when I divorced. We did not have any romantic designs on each other at all. He became my best friend and he helped me through my darkest hours. He had been through a divorce and understood. He told me that I was the first person he had ever worked with who never said one bad thing about their spouse. Needless to say when I came in and told everyone I was going through a divorce, they were surprised. I told them up front and told them to not ask me any questions. It was a very dark period in my life. Christi was only 10. We did fall madly and passionately in love. He told me he had been looking for the perfect woman and didn’t realize that I had been right under his nose the whole time. Go figure. Neither did I. When he said I do for better or worse, he didn’t have a clue what he was getting into. Now I probably have you curious about the “real” me. I hope so. There’s a “me” that few people know. I even surprise myself sometimes. I sometimes wonder if Charles would be surprised, but I really doubt it. He would probably say, you go girl! I have things that I wonder about even now, how is my life going to end up? Am I going to be alone the rest of my life? Will I ever find another love? Have I already found that love? Well, that is my secret and the only one who knows is Chloe and she’s not telling. Oh, the things that Chloe has seen and heard. Thank goodness she can’t tell on me. What do the songs you listen to remind you of? DR, 6/22/13

Jet Lag

I’ve heard people talk about jet lag for years, but I never experienced it and I really thought that they were making it up. I didn’t think anything could be that bad. Well, now I have experienced it and I felt like a fleet of Sherman tanks had run over my body and somebody stole my brain. I couldn’t even think any more. I am used to being in control and for the past few days I feel like I lost total control. The first morning I woke up in my bed, I was dreaming that I had overslept and everybody had left me. I was struggling to get up and the surroundings were different. I thought, why does this look like my bedroom? Oh my goodness, it is my bedroom. Oh how I love my bed. For almost two weeks the beds in Europe were only twin size. The rooms were very small. I took my own wash cloths. I left wash cloths in Amsterdam, Brussels, Paris, and London. Well, I took my ragged ones and I threw them in the garbage. It was wonderful to come back to ice cold water. We had water on the table, but it was usually warm. They don’t believe in ice cubes over there. I have to admit that I submitted to drinking a beer at most of my meals. The beer was ice cold. I will probably never touch another beer, but over there it was a life saver. I had never had a beer in my life! I ate some strange meals. But getting back to jet lag—when I got home I had forgotten that I had no food. Ok, so I’m on a diet, but this was ridiculous. I was so tired, I just went hungry. I did have coffee and my coffee tasted so wonderful. In Europe they are heavy coffee drinkers but the coffee was so strong. Have I already said that I had a wonderful time? I did and I would jump on the next plane back. Of the four cities, London was my favorite and I intend to go back. I want to take Christi with me the next time. Looks like I’ve got to really sell some houses. Be sure and call me. I’m back at work and I love it! My life is coming together and I’m loving it! Do something you’ve never done before. It may surprise you at how good it feels that you can look fear right in the face and do something that before had scared you to death! You can do it! I am doing it! DR 6/18/13

Christopher

Today you’re 21 and I just can’t believe it. It seems like yesterday when I saw you being born. You came out kicking and screaming at the top of your lungs. You had a head of hair that had so many cowlicks. You were such a beautiful baby—well you have turned into a handsome young man with a bright shining future ahead of you. I can remember when you were so little how you loved Barnie. My mother knew the words to every song Barnie ever sang. You would stand in your playpen and sing and dance to all of the songs. I remember when you started to school. Oh those were the years. Yes, you’ve always been the outspoken one. Hmmm, maybe you get that from me. Yes, you were always getting in trouble at school for things you would say. Looking back, those were really good years. Sometimes I wish you were that little boy again. I look at you now and I wonder where all of the years went. You are still the same loving boy and I’m so thankful that every time I see you, you always hug me and tell me that you love me. You don’t know how much that means to me. I hope to always have those hugs and words from you. I even like it when you pile into my lap and hug my neck. Yes, you nearly kill me but it’s fun. You’re always willing to take a chance and with that ambition your heart has been broken. I know how you feel because I’ve been there too. I never thought that you would be giving me advice on dating. You were telling me how men think and I was telling you the girl’s side. Who would ever think that I would even be in this situation. Well, Christopher I could tell so many things but it might be a little embarrassing, so I will end this with I hope you have many more birthdays and I hope your day today is all that you want. Today you have arrived, you are now a MAN! I love you! DR 6/15/13

The Time of My Life

I have to admit that the week before I was to leave for Europe I felt like saying that I was sick or something so I could get out of going. I had such a fear of the unknown. Sometimes we just have to suck it in and just do it. I’m so glad that I did. The plane ride from Atlanta to Amsterdam wasn’t nearly as bad as I thought it would be. After we were in the air, it was just like any other plane trip I had taken. The only drawback was that we were on that plane for so long. Amsterdam was the most fascinating city. It was very clean but I thought I would be brought back in a body bag from being run over by a bicycle. I have never seen so many bicycles in my life. Instead of cars, everyone rides a bike. The gas over there is very high. I saw people who looked like they should be in a nursing home who were riding bikes. From Amsterdam we rode our bus to Brussels. Oh, I need to back up and tell how many there were in our group. We had four groups—Tennessee, Georgia, Louisiana, and California. I have to admit the southern states seemed to stay together and the group from Burbank seemed to look down their noses at us. It’s ok, they warmed up to us after a while—at least most of them. There were 37 of us in all plus our tour leader James, who was from London. The next city was Brussels and frankly I just wasn’t impressed. It was ok. We only spent one night there and then we were off to Paris. I loved seeing the Eiffel Tower for real. It was like a dream come true. In fact, just seeing everything so far was truly wonderful and much better than any television program or pictures in a book. Everything was so much bigger than I ever imagined. I never thought that going into the Notre Dame Cathedral would be so emotional for me, but it was. I think because they were having mass, playing music that I was so familiar with, and then I wanted to light a candle for Charles. The emotion was so real. I cried all the way through. It was truly beautiful. The school teacher from Atlanta said her students wanted to sit down and pray and she was really moved by that. We had one bad experience in Paris. We left our hotel to get to the Euro train station around 6 a.m. It was pouring down rain and James told us to just get our luggage and get into the station as quickly as possible. We would all end up in the same coach. I did not notice the five young men who circled our bus, and I’m thankful. But one of our own was surrounded by three of them and she did not know until she got into the station that her wallet with all of her credit cards, driver’s license, money, and passport were stolen. They also took her cell phone. It was so hard for all of us to continue on to London without her and also our group leader. They spent the entire day at the police station and then Monday at the U.S. Embassy. They finally got to London Monday night. The police said that the train station was one of the worst crime areas. We thought that who would ever think that would happen on Sunday morning in the pouring down rain at 6 a.m.???? All I could do was say a prayer of thanks that I was ok. She was an experienced traveler—me, no way. I feel that I am now though. Anyway, the Euro train was great. We had to go through customs and all of that so it was a little more involved than the first two places we went to. I do believe London was my favorite place of the four cities. Maybe it’s because I love British comedies and Masterpiece Theater. All of that came alive for me. To see the changing of the guard was just fantastic. I never dreamed the buildings were so large there. James was really in his element there. I know there is so much to write about and maybe I will get to more things later. We all became a little wiser about watching about us. Our Tennessee group left two days early. I really hated that I would not see Stonehenge, but I have made it a priority that I’m going back. I want to see Stonehenge and also where they film Downton Abbey. Oh, James and I talked about Hercule Perot and he told me some things about him and also he knew about House of Cards which was on Masterpiece Theater several years ago. It was nice to talk to someone who knew all about some of my favorite things. On the last night in London we had fish and chips and then James took us on a tour of where Jack the Ripper killed his victims. Not only that but he described in detail each murder and that they think they actually caught the man who did them. After this man was sentenced to the insane asylum there were no more murders. Of course, James said the case is still open. The next morning our taxi took up to the London airport and then our long journey back home. It was great to be on American soil again and back to everything familiar. But why spend the rest of your life with only familiar things? It’s great to step out of your comfort zone and do something you’ve never done before. I’m so thankful that I had the courage to do that. I’m not afraid of my next adventure. Yes, I had the time of my life! DR 6/12/13

Difficult Week

This has been a week filled with disappointments and heartbreaks. As Charles would have said, I have had a week full of challenges. Some of them I have figured out solutions and some of the others I am dealing with. Well, this is life! A friend of mine died. I worked with her for many years at TVA. She was so full of life and such a good friend, but of course, we lost touch after I left TVA and she went to work at one of the nuclear plants. I felt so bad for her husband. I could feel what he was feeling. I just wonder if I will do that for the rest of my life. Some of my friends have told me that even after 14 or 15 years, they still do. Then, I have had some other things to happen and I ask myself, why when I’m trying to get ready for the biggest trip of my life. I’m so afraid I’ll forget something. I’m leaving so many loose ends. I even have those thoughts that something might happen and I won’t be back. I don’t know if everybody has these thoughts or not. Maybe I’m just weird. But, last night it seemed everything just overwhelmed me. My friend Jeanie called. I didn’t want to let her know that right at that moment I was crying, but she sensed it. I didn’t want her to know because she and her husband had been a bad automobile accident and they’re still stranded without a car. She’s the last person I should be whining to. But, she gave me the encouragement I needed. She said I know you love the verse Jeremiah 29:11, but I want you to read Psalm 139. I read the entire chapter this morning and it really blessed me through and through. I have been thinking what a failure I am and why can’t I get my act together. I used to be so organized and confident. My son-in-law was downstairs at the house we were working on last night and he saw I was crying. He asked what could he do, and I said just hold me and tell me everything will be ok. He did. He didn’t even ask any questions. I am so blessed with a wonderful son-in-law who loves and adores my daughter. I can say that I’m ok today. So what if a dozen things hit you in the face at one time. My Jeremiah 29:11 goes a little further by saying that “Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you search for me with all your heart.” I’m so thankful that God has been with me through everything bad and also everything good. He is the friend who is always there for me and knows my weaknesses, my shortcomings, my failures, and loves me unconditionally. DR 6/2/13