Difficult Week

This has been a week filled with disappointments and heartbreaks. As Charles would have said, I have had a week full of challenges. Some of them I have figured out solutions and some of the others I am dealing with. Well, this is life! A friend of mine died. I worked with her for many years at TVA. She was so full of life and such a good friend, but of course, we lost touch after I left TVA and she went to work at one of the nuclear plants. I felt so bad for her husband. I could feel what he was feeling. I just wonder if I will do that for the rest of my life. Some of my friends have told me that even after 14 or 15 years, they still do. Then, I have had some other things to happen and I ask myself, why when I’m trying to get ready for the biggest trip of my life. I’m so afraid I’ll forget something. I’m leaving so many loose ends. I even have those thoughts that something might happen and I won’t be back. I don’t know if everybody has these thoughts or not. Maybe I’m just weird. But, last night it seemed everything just overwhelmed me. My friend Jeanie called. I didn’t want to let her know that right at that moment I was crying, but she sensed it. I didn’t want her to know because she and her husband had been a bad automobile accident and they’re still stranded without a car. She’s the last person I should be whining to. But, she gave me the encouragement I needed. She said I know you love the verse Jeremiah 29:11, but I want you to read Psalm 139. I read the entire chapter this morning and it really blessed me through and through. I have been thinking what a failure I am and why can’t I get my act together. I used to be so organized and confident. My son-in-law was downstairs at the house we were working on last night and he saw I was crying. He asked what could he do, and I said just hold me and tell me everything will be ok. He did. He didn’t even ask any questions. I am so blessed with a wonderful son-in-law who loves and adores my daughter. I can say that I’m ok today. So what if a dozen things hit you in the face at one time. My Jeremiah 29:11 goes a little further by saying that “Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you search for me with all your heart.” I’m so thankful that God has been with me through everything bad and also everything good. He is the friend who is always there for me and knows my weaknesses, my shortcomings, my failures, and loves me unconditionally. DR 6/2/13