Every Song Has a Story

I always say that my life is like a song. Last night I was with my friend Jeanie at Steak and Shake. I love Steak and Shake mainly because of the music. Well, I do like their milkshakes. I treated myself to one last night and I felt like the biggest sinner on the face of the earth. I realized that with the songs that were being played, some memories were coming back. Some are good and some are not so good. I relate so much of my life to the music. I lost contact with some music during the 70’s. I won’t go into that here as to the why, but part of my life went a little crazy during those years. I heard one song last night and told Jeanie the story behind that one and it depressed me. I told Jeanie that I don’t regret the choices I have made because those choices have brought me to the person I am today. We can all go back and say what if I had done that different, what if I had married someone else. Well for me, I wouldn’t have Christi and my grandsons whom I love more than anything. Also, I probably wouldn’t have ended up with Charles who was the best thing that ever happened to me. We were the most unlikely couple and when we got married, all the men we worked with came to our wedding. They all had me convinced that Charles would chicken out. They were all surprised because Charles was so happy that day and couldn’t wait to become my husband. Until the day he died he always said we were still on our honeymoon. Like most marriages we had our ups and downs but we worked through all the challenges we faced, and I can tell you there were many. At one time we lived in three states at one time. My marriage to Charles was far from being dull and boring. I miss him and his weird outlook on things. The thing I miss most is that he was the only person who knew everything about me and I mean everything, and never judged or criticized me. He loved me for just me. He asked me before we ever dated and I was married to someone else, if I had ever been madly in love. I asked him had he and he said no. He said he wanted to fall madly and passionately in love some day. He always told me everything because he thought it was safe to. So he was the one I asked to take me to singles places when I divorced. We did not have any romantic designs on each other at all. He became my best friend and he helped me through my darkest hours. He had been through a divorce and understood. He told me that I was the first person he had ever worked with who never said one bad thing about their spouse. Needless to say when I came in and told everyone I was going through a divorce, they were surprised. I told them up front and told them to not ask me any questions. It was a very dark period in my life. Christi was only 10. We did fall madly and passionately in love. He told me he had been looking for the perfect woman and didn’t realize that I had been right under his nose the whole time. Go figure. Neither did I. When he said I do for better or worse, he didn’t have a clue what he was getting into. Now I probably have you curious about the “real” me. I hope so. There’s a “me” that few people know. I even surprise myself sometimes. I sometimes wonder if Charles would be surprised, but I really doubt it. He would probably say, you go girl! I have things that I wonder about even now, how is my life going to end up? Am I going to be alone the rest of my life? Will I ever find another love? Have I already found that love? Well, that is my secret and the only one who knows is Chloe and she’s not telling. Oh, the things that Chloe has seen and heard. Thank goodness she can’t tell on me. What do the songs you listen to remind you of? DR, 6/22/13